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English translation
3351. It was narrated that Abû Al-'Ajfâ' said: "Umar bin Al-Khaṭṭâb said: 'Do not go to extremes with regard to the dowries of women, for if that were a sign of honor and dignity in this world, or a sign of piety before Allâh, the Mighty and Sublime, then Muḥammad ﷺ would have done that before you. But he did not give any of his wives, and none of his daughters were given, more than twelve Uqiyah. A man may increase the dowry until he feels resentment against her and says: You cost me everything I own ('Alaqul-Qirbah')'" 'And I was a man born among the 'Arabs,[1] but I did not know the meaning of 'Alaqul-Qirbah'[2] and
others of you are saying – about those killed in this or that battle of yours, or who died: “So-and so was martyred,” or ‘so and so died as a martyr.’ While perhaps he merely overloaded the backside of his beast, or lined his saddle with gold or silver seeking trade. So do not say that, rather say as the Prophet ﷺ said: ‘Whoever is killed in the cause of Allāh, or dies, then he is in Paradise.’” (Hasan)
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Footnotes
1
[1] In Musnad Al-Humaidi (23) it is: "And I was a young man."
2
[2] Meaning, due to the ambiguity of the expression: 'Alaqul-Qirbah'. A Qirbah is a very large water skin that only a very strong man could carry. So the meaning is that I gave you everything until I even carried a giant water skin to your family, or, did so much that I even sweated enough to fill such a water-skin. In Al-Tlal wa Ma'rifat Ar-Rijâl (No. 95) Ahmad narrated regarding this, from Sufyân, who is one of those who narrated this Hadîth as recorded by others: "Until I carried a Qirbah from far away."
Commentary
‘Twelve’: mean twelve and a half as has preceded in another Hadīth. However, the fractions have been dropped here. This narration also demonstrates the abhorrence of calling so-and-so “Shahīd” as clearly indicated and prohibited by the statement of ‘Umar, in spite of whoever opposes him after him.
